Posted: 5:58 am Wednesday, July 30th, 2014

Dating: When do you give gifts? 

By Wise Diva

My friend Paul is apprehensive about giving women gifts. He has only been seeing someone a few months. She has a birthday coming up but he believes giving gifts too early is a mistake. In the past, giving gifts backfired on him. He thinks that it conveys a message that you’re trying to buy affection.

I have noticed that men don’t pursue women through gifts and it is probably best when you are unsure where you stand. If you know the feelings are mutual, I think it is sweet to buy gifts for one another.

How do you know when you have reached the gift buying stage in dating? When you are just starting to date, what is the difference between buying someone dinner and buying them a gift?

11 comments
Sassy Me -)
Sassy Me -)

I'm sure, with two little ones in the house  along with your regular responsibilities you are quite busy. Glad all is well, though :-)

i'm swiss
i'm swiss

Hey @Sassy Me -) 


We're all doing great, thanks!  Just been busy as a MF'er over here, but all's well.

Sassy Me -)
Sassy Me -)

Damn Swiss...lol

How are you and the wife n kiddies doing?

i'm swiss
i'm swiss

@SlimNu -- I think you should change you avatar to a closeup of your CT.  Maybe that would drive some traffic in here...  lol 

SlimNu
SlimNu

All time low today

Kimmieakasmooth
Kimmieakasmooth

Hey gang!

I don't see the big deal, but maybe it backfired in the past for Paul for a variety of reasons. Maybe he tried to get to extravagant too soon. Or maybe he kept it simple but the women were unappreciative or had unrealistic expectations. Either way, Paul should do what's in his heart & what his wallet will comfortably allow. Even if it's only been a few months, I think she'll be expecting some kind of acknowledgement of her birthday! A nice dinner and a small trinket or card should suffice. Phrase it like "I'd like to take you out for your birthday". Don't overthink it just because it didn't go so well in the past. If this is a bust too, well then Paul knows where he stands with her. Don't change the kind of man he is because some tired chicks in the past could not handle it.

SlimNu
SlimNu

Morning,

I don't see anything wrong with just going out to dinner and getting a funny card or something. Like it's already been said, it doesn't have to be anything BIG.

Leggs123
Leggs123

Hope to log back in later...going on a tour to Plant Scherer and Plant Smarr....I feel many yawns coming on!  Enjoy your day.

Single & Happy
Single & Happy

Hello everyone 


Buy a gift when you feel like it. I don't care if we've been together one week, or one year, I don't ever feel obligated to buy someone a gift. 


When you are just starting to date, what is the difference between buying someone dinner and buying them a gift? Umm one you can eat, the other you can do something else with?? 


Leggs123
Leggs123

Dang, just knew I'd be first.

Good morning, Cateyeslee

Gifts are given when I feel like giving one.  The gift given can determine if you're giving the gift to buy affection or not.  Nothing wrong with giving your mate a bday gift a few months into the relationship.  Doesn't have to extravagant.  A card, perhaps some flowers delivered to her job, a lunch date, dinner date, a book.  Lots of little, nice gifts can be given.

Cateyeslee
Cateyeslee

Good morning,

Did not know there was a time limit, either you want to buy someone something or you don't.  Sounds like Paul really doesn't like her because if he did it would not be an issue.

Who says it has to be expensive in the first place?  If i see something i know my guy likes i buy it , its not that big of a deal.